How I became a stripper and an award winning pole dancer (or I rather have a cake in ma face than in ma mouth)

I really wanted to tell you guys about how I became a stripper and an award winning pole dancer… but then I was hit, straight in ma FACE, with the latest breaking, shocking news in Sweden-town… ! I simply cannot obsess about my own stripping, pole dancing galore past while this outrage is affecting my country. This shit needs to be talked about. Even more than it already is. It’s scary how much of a life us Swedes have these days, only ultra-extraordinary news like this will make us react.

Story is: Basically the leader of the Swedish racist party had a book signing for his autobiography, when a woman caked him. To cake someone is when you throw/press/squash* a cake in someones face. And this is exactly what happened. Now Swedes are outraged because this should not happen (never mind peeps being killed, murdered, raped all around the world, CAKING should not happen). Clearly we have massive issues with security. A quote I read relating to this horrible, horrible ordeal translates to “cakings are no fun”. Well, I don’t think racisms‘ much fun either… but hey, that’s just me. I believe in the freedom of speech. Massively. But I also believe in the freedom of everyone being equal. No matter colour, race, sex, sexual orientation etc. It’s not even a matter of freedom, it’s a fucking given in ma hood. Voltaire is even being quoted in these articles. “I disapprove of what you say, but I will defend to the death your right to say it”. I.e. if you’re a racist, you should be able to speak your mind, without going through the trauma of being caked. In public and all. Trauma galore. I just wanna add that the Voltaire quote is not accurate to begin with, it was an author named Evelyn Beatrice Hall AKA S.G. Tallentyre, who wrote it in her biography on Voltaire. And guess second thing I’d like to add is, what a waste of a fucking cake… surely there would have been something less eatable, more… hmmm what’s the word I’m looking for her? Lethal, brutal, heavy? To blast in his fucking face. Perhaps? Just a thought. On a good note I just wanna declare that I had sushi twice today. I have an ultra-exciting life. Stay tuned.
*A butternut squash is a sex position in which a cowgirl does a reverse cowgirl and sticks her head between her legs and butters the squash.

(naturally I’ve attached the outrageous video of the epic caking…. enjoy party peeps. I promise I will neva eva post a vid of this boring caliber eva again – gangsta promise).

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